Thursday, July 26, 2012

The Birth of Baby Jáchym

At 4:50 am on Tuesday morning (July 24, 2012) I checked into the hospital with my husband (Jesse) in tow, ready for my scheduled induction at exactly 38 weeks.

After answering 817 medical questions, I received the first dose of Cytotek at 6:10 am…I was still 3 cm dilated, which I had been for a couple weeks.

Tomas and Honza arrived at the hospital at about 7:15 and shortly after they arrived, my doctor broke my water. A little while later, I had started to contract a bit more, but nothing quite regular. Definitely stronger, though.

As soon as my friend Kelly arrived at about 8:00, I sported the fancy fish-net panties along with the very fashionable hospital gown and decided to walk the halls for a bit. As I walked around with Jesse and Kelly, my contractions picked up…considerably. After about an hour of walking and contracting, I decided it was time to wave my white flag. It was time for the epidural.

I went back to my room and the nurse checked me—I was 6 cm at that point. Not thinking of anything else, all I wanted was Mr anesthesiologist to hook me up with the good stuff…which he did pretty quickly…but in contracting pregnant person time it seemed like eternity. While he was placing the epidural, I recall my nurse making a call to another nurse to “set up the table” in the room because I was “progressing quite quickly”.

Not 15 minutes after the epidural was placed, my doctor walked in and that’s when the whirlwind began. They started breaking down the table, putting up the stirrup’y things and all this time I’m wondering what the heck is going on…I didn’t feel like I needed to push (and in my past births, I’ve always had that “feeling”).

The doctor, meanwhile, is all gowned up and now sitting in front of me, spotlight on the who ha, telling me to push.

Uh, what? Now? I’m ready?

So I pushed. And my pushing was wimpy. I knew it. Doc knew it. I barely tried because I was just in shock I was even ready. So, I was lectured and told to push a little better next contraction.

And that, I did.

One more contraction and one hell of a push and baby Jáchym was born at exactly 10:01 am (yes, that was less than 4 hours since my cytotek…and no pitocin)! As soon as he came out, Tomas cut the cord and the baby was handed to Honza. Cue the tears. What an amazing thing to see their faces, their eyes light up, their smile…to see the look of excitement and awe and wonder as their son immediately fulfilled an unnoticeable void that one could only now observe by seeing this one very moment.

That moment. That moment will be with me forever. That moment was why I did this. That moment made up for any pain or swelling or complaints I may have had for the past 9 months. That moment is what being a surrogate is about.

Jáchym was born 8 pounds, 3 ounces and 21 inches long…being 2 weeks early, he was a big boy! I wonder what he would have weighed had he made it to term? Of my own children, my largest was 7 pounds, 10 ounces—so Jáchym wins the biggest baby prize for me!

Shortly after he was born, the guys stayed with their son to do all the new born baby “stuff” that is usually completed. They couldn't take their eyes of their own son. When you have your own child, you know the feelings that come over you with a new baby…your baby. This was different. To be able to witness those feelings from across the room with a completely newly formed family was truly amazing. Truly. Indescribable.

The guys went with Jáchym to the nursery and I hung out in my room with Jesse and Kelly. I didn’t realize this, but they had actually started the Pitocin AFTER he was born—I understand it to help the uterus contract back down after delivery. Being there without Jáchym was kind of surreal. I had just had a baby, yet here I was without a baby. It wasn’t a bad feeling, it was just odd. It certainly was kind of nice, being able to recover after the delivery by just “hanging out” with my loved ones and talking about the experience that we all just went through.

Jáchym checked out just fine. He was 100% healthy and perfect. Besides my own husband at our own children’s births, I have never seen happier men than Tomas and Honza. You wouldn’t have been able to wipe the smiles off their faces even if you tried.

Minus one little hospital legal issue (which I won’t get into quite yet), everything went perfectly. I couldn’t have asked for a more ideal delivery. Everyone that I wanted to be there was there. The nurse I requested was there (she was my nurse for my other deliveries….all 3!) and my doctor was the one to deliver Jáchym. My husband and friend were there for my support. Perfection.

That moment right after the birth was my favorite. However, later on in the day I heard from both Tomas and Honza separately that this was the happiest day of their life. Can anything top that? Really? And to say that I had a part of that…there are no words.

Physically I feel great. I had a minor tear that only required one stitch, but thankfully it hasn’t been painful at all. I am cramping a bit here and there (especially when I pump) but nothing that a little (or a lotta) ibuprofen hasn’t taken care of. That little legal issue I mentioned above has caused some sleepless moments for me (literally) over the course of the last 48 hours but I can deal with that-I’ll have plenty of time to sleep at home.

Emotionally I’m having a bit of a hard time. The word that comes to mind is overwhelmed. I’m overwhelmed with a mixture of emotions, not one specific one. No, I’m not sad that I don’t have a baby to bring home—it’s nothing like that. What it is is the amount of people that have made comments to me about how awesome I am to do this. How amazing of a person I am. How selfless I am. I wasn’t prepared for this response from virtually everyone I ran into-in person, via e-mail, on Facebook. I did not do this for that kind of response and I just wasn’t ready for it. Plus, the hormones are all wacked out anyway, so after a few days I’ll be fine. I just have to process everything, take it all in and know that I did the ultimate. I helped create a family. I helped the dream of two men come true. No words can describe that.  None.

And now for the good stuff...PHOTOS!!

Look at that Hair!!!  Thanks for the heartburn, kid. :)


The new dads.  Yeah, that's awesome, huh?

Me and the little one.

Leaving the hospital.
I've got plenty more on my mind right now, but I will leave you with the above for now.  Stay tuned for more updates and, of course, more photos of this new and very awesome family.


  1. What a wonderful birth story and a wonderful, fantastic day for all involved. I'm proud of you. Congrats to the new perfect family of three!

  2. I have always said that the first two weeks post surrogacy are like living on another planet. I am not really sad, it's just that every emotion is in overdrive. It's very overwhelming. Deep breaths. It gets easier.

  3. What can I say my friend...

    You're beautiful. This story is beautiful. Jachym and his Daddies look beautiful together.

    Perfect ending to a perfect journey. Post journey is going to be perfect too.

    You're the awesoemest. XO

  4. that look is exactly right...i felt the same way after all the bed rest and heart ache i went through. congratulations again to you and your IFs...that little boy is gorgeous!!

  5. I'm so happy everything except the one legal blimp went according to plan. Jachym is a beautiful baby and his daddies look over the moon. Amazing! I'm happy to have followed and learned from your amazing journey. Love you!

  6. What a beautiful birth story. I'm so happy that you were able to give this incredible gift to another family. It must be the most amazing feeling! Happy healing and hopefully lots of sleep!

  7. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SHARING THIS. Although you could have warned me to get my kleenex! He is absolutely stunning!! LOOK AT WHAT YOU CREATED!! A beautiful family!

  8. So amazing! Hope you are starting to feel better and back to yourself again.

    P.s....can someone say HOT IF alert! ;)

  9. Isn't that birth moment just awesome?! I will never forget the reactions of the fathers as Jonas was born. Such an amazing feeling to make that happen.