I've been doing a lot of reminiscing over the past few days about this entire surrogacy experience. And yes, as I reminisce, I cry (still). I'm not crying because I'm sad....I'm crying because this whole experience has been nothing but wonderful...and yes, everything is still quite overwhelming. I have a feeling it will be for quite a bit longer. I cannot begin to tell you how unbelievably amazing everything has been--from the application process to the matching process to the transfer to the delivery. Every step was truly something I will treasure forever.
While MANY people have been a part of this process, there are a few that I need to publicly thank. Without them, I wouldn't have been able to do what I did.
My husband, Jesse--
If there is one person that I can say was on this journey with me every step of the way, it's my husband. Had he not supported this from day one, it wouldn't have happened. He never griped at having to go through medical screening (for himself), he didn't complain at having to endure my hormonal roller coaster while on the meds. He was the one that had to deal with all the ups and downs of the process. He was right there with me for everything and I wouldn't have wanted anyone else by my side.
Jesse, there are not enough words to thank you for the support you have given me through this journey. I'm sorry if I was ever hormonal and I'm sorry if I complained about my ankles being swollen or made too many groans while trying to move with a huge belly. Your love and support have gotten me through this entire process--for that I thank and appreciate you more every time I think about it. It wasn't just me that helped create a new family, it was every much your journey as well. Love you. Always.
My friend, Kelly--
Kelly was the lucky one with me in the delivery room as my support person. I was slightly afraid when I first asked if she would want to be there with me, that she might be weirded out by it. That was as far from reality as possible. She was actually excited about it! When it came time for the delivery day, Kelly was beyond a support for me. She was my rock. My "crap I'm having a contraction, rub my back" person. She kept telling me what a great job I was doing while in labor (yes, I heard you every time, girl) and was just awesome. Even after the birth, she was uber supportive. And still is.
Kelly, I am so glad you were able to share that awesome moment with me as a new family was created. Your stellar photography skills were much appreciated as well-an amazing way to remember those moments. Thank you for your support not only in the delivery room, but through the entire process. You're an awesome person and I'm so glad to call you my STEP cousin. HA HA HA!! No really, I'm so glad to call you my friend. Thank you again for EVERYTHING.
My Mother In Law, Colleen--
Colleen, or "granny nanny" as we call her, is just pure awesome. I couldn't have asked for a better mother in law. Really. I'm not even saying that because she may read this blog. I think she's beyond great and I'm so lucky. She's been such a support to me and the family and is the best kid-watcher around.
Colleen, thank you so much for always being willing to take the kids when I ask if you can or offering even when I don't ask. Your willingness to watch them sometimes freaks me out (I don't know who in their right mind would WANT to watch 3 kids for days at a time) but please know that every moment is much appreciated. And thank you, also, for all your support in this surrogate journey. I always enjoy our chats and late night TV watchings...and of course I really enjoy your cooking!! :) I think you totally are the greatest mother in law ever.
My friend, Jeni--
Jeni is pretty much the reason this journey happened. She's the one who pushed me to apply with Circle...and had I not done that, I wouldn't have been matched with Tomas and Honza. Jeni (being a surrogate herself) has been such a support for me--she can relate on a level that no one else can, having already been through everything that I was going through during this journey. She is also a tremendous support for me in these post-surrogate times. She knows. She's been there.
Jeni, my ling lost, I can't begin to tell you how awesome you are. You have become such a friend to me and I am so lucky to have you in my life. Thank you for being there for me through the ups and downs I've had through this journey (and even not on this journey). There's no one that understands me more as a surrogate than you do. When we talk, you get it...and that means so much, you have no idea. I am so blessed we met and am proud and so very lucky to call you my friend.
My friend, Cole--
Cole has been a friend for YEARS. Regardless of what is going on in my life, I can count on her for anything. She's that person that you just...need.
Cole, thank you for simply being there when I needed to talk. Or write. Or text. I know I can count on you to be there for me and never cause drama.
Tomas and Honza--
I still remember that e-mail from Circle with "A profile to view" in the subject line. I remember the butterflies and excitement I felt as I double clicked the e-mail to open it. Naturally, I went right for the photos first...and fell in love with two amazing men in that one moment. It was instant. And I knew exactly what I wanted at that very second. I wanted to be their surrogate. Thankfully, they chose me to do just that.
I'm choosing to thank them a little differently, a little more non public--plus, I can't seem to type a thank you to the guys because as I try to type something out to them and can't see the computer screen anymore....you can figure out why.
Finally, thank you to YOU, my blog reader. I've used this blog as a way to communicate the surrogacy process-sometimes for you, but a lot of the times for my own personal need. I appreciate all the comments you've made. Yes, I read them all. And then I re-read them. I appreciate you following me through this journey and hope you will continue to follow what lies ahead. I promise to continue this blog (I've got a lot more on my mind, no worries) with stories and photos and good stuff surrounding being a surrogate and a person with some fun stuff to share. This is far from good-bye.
And who knows...maybe we'll do another installment of "An International Surrogacy Journey" in the future...